Vent - Let out your frustration

Doormat Relationships

I'm a doormat. Why? Because I care about people. Yet I'm finding some of my closest friends don't hesitate to take advantage of me all the time...these are friends who will say they love me and say they love Jesus...they come to me with their problems and their hurts and their questions, and then when maybe I just wish I had just.. maybe a hug... or a little kind word, I have to spell everything out in kindergarten language for them to understand that. That's not all. When I'm with a group of friends, I'm the last person who gets a say in anything, the last person people think about including, and I'm the person who lets them get away with things, lets them hurt me and say "oh, it's okay cause you're my friend," lets them do what they want to do to be happy, and me? well...I just wish they'd notice that I'm a human being once in a while. I wish I could be the one who to them is worth taking a risk for, instead of me constantly trying my best all the time to be the best friend I can as they still push me to the "back of the line" and include me in things only when it feels the easiest. I'm tired of feeling like I'm the only one who's even trying. Why can't people seriously just actually show...even in a small way... that they give a rip? Is that too much to ask after I break my own heart over them daily? I'm not feeling sorry for myself as much as more just venting frustration at how selfish other people can be sometimes.

Phyllis 2004-08-01 13:10 1176

that is very descriptive way to explain that and I know exactly what you mean. and The first time you have a heart to heart..you are the problem..sheesh.

Azrael 2004-08-01 08:01 1166

..woah...reading that post was like watching an after-school special based on my life. LOL i feel your pain, Sporkatron. I'm a doormat of the "nice guy/caring friend" variety, and as such, get a lot of the same crud to deal with. I'm the problem-solving wunderkind, the strategist, and the Superman for the 30 mile radius around my physical shell. but does the big furry teddy bear get a hug when he feels upset? no. does he get a phone call when he's lonely, to let him know he's got friends? 'course not. y'know why? "'Cuz you're invincible and impervious to emotional pain!" yeah. right. sure. Every day that passes leaves me feeling more and more like a combination of a psych ward patient, a comic book anti-hero, and Hamlet, Prince of Denmark. sheesh. "If you prick us, do we not bleed?"

kit kat 2004-06-25 12:08 1149

I can relate. I hope you find some friends who DO appreciate you. They probably don't know how you feel.